Personal Empowerment Is an Inside Job
By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldI was not a good student. In elementary school I had trouble reading and felt ashamed that I was always put in the second or third reading groups. I was self-critical and worried that I…
By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldI was not a good student. In elementary school I had trouble reading and felt ashamed that I was always put in the second or third reading groups. I was self-critical and worried that I was dumb.
The week before I entered the seventh grade, I began to realize I could change my thinking about myself. I clearly remember the time and place when I announced to my mother the new awareness. It was after a Friday night football game as we walked to our car. I calmly said to her, “I am going to be a good student.”That declaration was powerful, and I did become a good student, but even more powerful was my new awareness that I could choose my thoughts. As a young adult I continued to be aware of the power of my thoughts and how to direct my attention. Once I became aware of my thinking and where I chose to place my focus, I shifted how I related to external events, people, and situations.
If I was speaking today to my younger self, I would offer these principles to her:“Events take on meaning depending on how you think about them, and most importantly, how you relate to yourself. You may have had an awareness when you gave meaning to an otherwise neutral event, then discovered that changing your thinking shifted the meaning you had given it.
Ultimately, you are the source of your power to choose how you make meaning of life. No set of circumstances—not the weather, the amount of money in your bank account, or political events—has the power to separate you from your ability to formulate your own thoughts about them.
When you understand that your experience of life comes from your own mind, you are no longer a Victim of outside events. However, if you believe external circumstances dictate your thinking, you will experience a disempowering thought pattern. The way of empowerment is a complete reversal of this old model.
You are a Creator. You have agency over your thoughts and can choose where to place your focus at any moment. If you perceive that you are helpless to choose, you are at risk of taking on the Victim mentality, giving your power away to outside circumstances.
The way of personal empowerment requires that you choose your attitude toward yourself and life events. You are the power and source of all that you think. Situations that are pleasant are easier to have empowering thoughts about, but it is impossible for those neutral events to be the source of your thinking. Only you are.Becoming more aware of your thoughts is the first step toward personal empowerment. The second step is to take responsibility for choosing your thoughts and response to life, no matter what the situation or difficulty.
When you understand that your experience of life comes from your own mind, you are no longer a Victim of outside events. Instead, you trust that you have the power to choose another thought, and that new thought can shift your experience.
The secret is your willingness, dear one, to accept that you have the power to choose, at each moment. It can never be taken from you, nor granted to you by any other source.”I am grateful that I discovered this truth at a relatively early age, and it has become a guiding principle in my life. I have learned that personal empowerment is an inside job and rests upon my ability to be aware, to focus my attention, and take responsibility for my thinking. These are core principles we share at the Center for The Empowerment Dynamic.
I also teach and share these principles during the Coaching with The Empowerment Dynamic course that kicks off Tuesday, Feb. 25. If these are ideas that would enrich your coaching, counseling, therapy practice, or who you are as a leader, I hope you will consider joining the course. You can apply and learn more here.Until next time, here’s to the Creator in you.Donna