# The Empowerment Dynamic

> The Empowerment Dynamic (TED*) helps individuals, coaches, and organizations shift from drama to empowered, creator-oriented thinking through training, certification, tools, and resources.

## About this site

The site contains information about TED* training and certification, personal and organizational development, workshops, books, resources, success stories, and a regularly updated blog.

## Main sections

- [The Empowerment Dynamic | Leadership & Relationship Training](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/): Leadership, relationship, and personal development training built on The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [Blog | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/blog): Stories, frameworks, and practices for shifting from drama to empowerment.
- [About | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/about): Learn about the Center for The Empowerment Dynamic, our story, mission, and founders.
- [For Individuals | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/individuals): Personal development offerings built on The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [For Professionals | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/professionals): Certification programs and advanced training for coaches, therapists, and facilitators.
- [For Organizations | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/organizations): Organizational programs that build creator-oriented culture at every level.
- [Enroll — Upcoming Trainings & Events | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/enroll): Browse upcoming TED* certifications, webinars, and workshops.
- [Certified Professionals Directory | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/directory): Find a certified TED* coach, therapist, or facilitator.
- [Certification Programs | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/certification): Explore certification requirements, benefits, and the journey to mastery with The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [Creator Community | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/community): Deepen your practice of The Empowerment Dynamic with a committed community.
- [All Courses | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses): Explore courses and certification programs built on The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [Certified TED* Practitioner | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses/certified-ted-practitioner): Learn about becoming a certified TED* practitioner.
- [Resources | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/resources): Free and paid resources to support your TED* practice.
- [Success Stories | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/success-stories): Real stories of transformation with The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [Contact Us | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/contact): Get in touch with the Center for The Empowerment Dynamic.
- [Privacy Policy | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/privacy): Privacy policy for The Empowerment Dynamic website and services.
- [Terms of Service | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/terms): Terms of Service for The Empowerment Dynamic website and services.
- [Accessibility Statement | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/accessibility): Accessibility Statement for The Empowerment Dynamic website.
- [Webinars | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/webinars): Live and on-demand webinars on The Empowerment Dynamic and the 3 Vital Questions.
- [Books | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/books): Books by David Emerald on The Empowerment Dynamic and the 3 Vital Questions.
- [Trust Reflection Tool | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/trust-reflection-tool): Reflect on trust and empowerment with this TED* tool.
- [TED* Foundations | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses/ted-foundations): An immersive certification experience for coaches, practitioners, and educators.
- [TED* Advanced Coaching | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses/ted-advanced): Deepen your coaching practice with TED* Advanced Coaching.
- [3 Vital Questions Facilitator Certification | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses/3vq-facilitator): Become a certified 3 Vital Questions facilitator.
- [3 Vital Questions eCourse | The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courses/3vq-ecourse): A self-paced online course for shifting toward empowered action.

## Current blog posts

- [Awaken Your Challenger Energy](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/awaken-your-challenger-energy): From Fighter to Truth Teller
- [Navigating Difficult Conversations with The Empowerment Dynamic](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/navigating-difficult-conversations-with-the-empowerment-dynamic): Who do you want to be when you are in difficult conversations?
- [Is Drama Addictive?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/is-drama-addictive): Why your brain might be wired for conflict—and how to rewire it for creativity.
- [Stop Rescuing. Start Empowering](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/stop-rescuing-start-empowering): How to Shift from Taking Over to Empowering Others
- [Make Use of Your Obstacles](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/make-use-of-your-obstacles): It is not what happens to us that matters most — it is how we respond
- [How to Give Feedback and Avoid Being a Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/how-to-give-feedback-and-avoid-being-a-persecutor): Are You Trying to Help — or Trying to Control?
- [Ending Your Inner Argument](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ending-your-inner-argument): The shift begins when I can meet my feelings with curiosity rather than judgment.
- [Problems Stick Together Like Glue](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/problems-stick-together-like-glue): Problems become like glue. The more we focus on them, the stickier they get.
- [Who's Making the Call? ](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/whos-making-the-call): Principles for relating to AI as a Creator
- [Whatever Happens, I will Meet the Moment](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/whatever-happens-i-will-meet-the-moment): Security is trusting that, whatever happens, I will meet the moment.
- [Claim Your Inner Authority](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/claim-your-inner-authority): David Emerald, the co-founder and originator of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic®), often said, “You cannot do this work without doing this work."
- [The Soft Pause: The Creator’s Secret Ally](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-soft-pause-the-creators-secret-ally): When I ask people what they use when feeling triggered, the number one answer I hear is, “I pause.
- [When Someone Trusts You Before You've Earned It](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/when-someone-trusts-you-before-youve-earned-it): Trust and The Empowerment Dynamic
- [The Power to Choose](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-power-to-choose): While you may not always control your circumstances, you can choose your response.
- [Caught in the Imposter Syndrome](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/caught-in-the-imposter-syndrome): I’ve been reflecting lately on how often I still get caught in the Imposter Syndrome. After more than 20 years of teaching and writing about TED* — The Empowerment Dynamic® — you would think I’d have…
- [The Hoped-For Rescuer](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-hoped-for-rescuer): Have you ever experienced someone driving recklessly on the freeway, weaving through lanes and almost causing an accident? You may think to yourself, “I hope there’s a highway patrol officer around…
- [3 Ways to Help Others Feel Seen and Appreciated](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/3-ways-to-help-others-feel-seen-and-appreciated): Times are difficult, and many people are feeling emotionally exhausted in the wake of wars, tragedies, uncertainty, and division. You may have moments when you wonder if there is anything meaningful…
- [Speaking With Empowered Language](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/speaking-with-empowered-language): Words carry energy. By listening to your language, you can increase your awareness of unconscious speech patterns that may keep you trapped in old and disempowering stories about yourself. It…
- [Stop Condemning Yourself](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/stop-condemning-yourself): One of the most painful habits many of us carry is self-condemnation. If we notice someone’s glaring glance or sharp tone, we might respond with a defensive comment—and then, within seconds, turn…
- [Focus on Intentions More Than Goals](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/focus-on-intentions-more-than-goals): Goal setting is a valuable skill that helps you stay on track and get things done. Goals are essential for completing immediate tasks, such as clearing your office or learning a new computer skill. They can increase your…
- [Remembering Our Dear Friend and Creator David Emerald Womeldorff](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/remembering-our-dear-friend-and-creator-david-emerald-womeldorff): What do Unthinkable Emotional Pain, Unimaginable Compassion, Uncommon Wisdom, and Uproarious Laughter share in common? All four of these are aspects of the deep, abiding, and…
- [Self-Compassion: One Way to Survive This Level of Global Uncertainty](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/self-compassion-one-way-to-survive-this-level-of-global-uncertainty): Collectively, the world feels fractured in so many ways—politically, environmentally, financially, and socially. And personally, many of us are navigating loss, change, the relentless pace of demands, and the quiet grief…
- [Disrupting the Human Need to Feel Important](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/disrupting-the-human-need-to-feel-important): There’s a very human part of everyone that wants to feel important. We may not need to be famous or admired by the masses. Just important—respected, valued, seen. Doesn’t everyone want that? Over time I’ve realized how…
- [I AM Worthy](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/i-am-worthy): The other night, a friend and I were watching a romantic comedy. It wasn’t a profound movie—just light, entertaining, and easy to enjoy. But in the middle of it, there was a moment that stayed with us. Two young adults,…
- [Energy Flows Where Your Attention Goes](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/energy-flows-where-your-attention-goes): There’s an old story about a man searching for his car keys under a streetlight. A passerby joins him. After a few minutes the passerby asks, “Are you sure you lost your keys here?”“No,” the man replies. “I lost them in…
- [There’s Always a Commitment Behind Your Complaint](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/theres-always-a-commitment-behind-your-complaint): I admit I have caught myself complaining a lot lately. If I am uncentered and reactive I can complain about everyday situations like the weather, too much noise as well as significant and critical issues -- injustices,…
- [Powerful Challengers in a Time When Truth Feels Relative](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/powerful-challengers-in-a-time-when-truth-feels-relative): I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a time when truth has felt so relative. Facts are debated. Motives are assumed. The unraveling of truth seems to be everywhere. And when truth becomes relative, we lose trust—trust…
- [You Cannot Not Create](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/you-cannot-not-create-2): One of the most surprising lessons of this past year—through grief, reorganizing companies, and forming new partnerships—was realizing that something was being created whether I was aware of it or not. One of David’s…
- [The Hard Wall of Judgment](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-hard-wall-of-judgment): Of the many people I’ve talked with over the last two decades—through professional coaching relationships and through teaching The Empowerment Dynamic (TED*) —the number one complaint I hear people make about themselves…
- [Ending the War Within](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ending-the-war-within): For the last decade or so, I have been aware of my ongoing deficiency story that quietly but clearly operates in the background of my consciousness. It sounds like this: “When am I going to get this figured out?” It’s…
- [The Hidden Arrogance of the Rescuer](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-hidden-arrogance-of-the-rescuer): Thank you to those who have subscribed to our new Creator Community. Our first live call together was powerful and insightful. Join our community and the live session with Donna on Thursday, Feb 5 at 8 AM PST. We’ll dig…
- [The Stranglehold of Our Attachments](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-stranglehold-of-our-attachments): Would you like to dive deeper into the TED* roles, connect with me and other Creators? I want to invite you to join our Creator Community. See detailed information below or click HERE to join now. By Donna ZajoncLast…
- [Why Humility Matters Now More Than Ever](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/why-humility-matters-now-more-than-ever): Would you like to dive deeper into the TED* roles, connect with me and other Creators? I want to invite you to join our Creator Community. See detailed information below or click HERE to join now. Humility is the quality…
- [Escaping the Drama Triangle: The Way Out Is Not What You Think](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/escaping-the-drama-triangle-the-way-out-is-not-what-you-think): The Karpman Drama Triangle is a simple yet profound social model that explains how people respond when they feel stressed, threatened, or stuck in conflict. Developed in 1968 by San Francisco psychiatrist Stephen…
- [I Am a Creator: Living the Truth of Who I Am](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/i-am-a-creator-living-the-truth-of-who-i-am): *Kick off the new year by joining the Creator Community! Read below for information on how to join * As we step into a new year, I quietly carry a familiar hope — a hope I know many of you share: This year, I’ll finally…
- [Allow Yourself to be Awe-Inspired](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/allow-yourself-to-be-awe-inspired): “Awe is the feeling of being in the presence of something vast or beyond human scale, that transcends our current understanding of things,” says renowned psychologist Dr. Dacher Keltner. Awe is a unique emotional…
- [Choosing the Light in a Time of Darkness](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/choosing-the-light-in-a-time-of-darkness): I am writing this week from Mexico, where for the past three winters I have enjoyed the privilege of living here during the colder months in the US. Each time I arrive, I feel an almost immediate lift in my spirit. The…
- [Less Judging, More Listening: What I Learned from My Time in Politics](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/less-judging-more-listening-what-i-learned-from-my-time-in-politics): In the world of politics, the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) triangle is on full display. No matter one’s political persuasion, applying the drama triangle framework can help explain how easy it is to become emotional when…
- [Activating Your Coach Essence: Trusting Your Wisdom Within](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/activating-your-coach-essence-trusting-your-wisdom-within): I remember it as if it were yesterday. I was sitting in front of my coaching-school classmatesmore than twenty-five years ago. It was my turn to practice a live coaching demonstration with the instructor, and halfway…
- [Forgiveness: The Doorway to Gratitude](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/forgiveness-the-doorway-to-gratitude): Last week I wrote about gratitude —that gentle, heart-opening energy that reminds us how blessed we already are. Gratitude shifts our focus from what’s missing to what’s present, from fear to appreciation. Yet as I…
- [Gratitude: The Antidote to Energy Drain](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/gratitude-the-antidote-to-energy-drain): We've all heard it. Be grateful. Count your blessings. Focus on what you have, not what you lack. And if you're anything like me, I’ve heard the lectures on gratitude for decades but when life feels hard “just be…
- [I Am Enough: The Counter to the Victim Voice](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/i-am-enough-the-counter-to-the-victim-voice): Last week my co-facilitator opened our coaching course webinar with a simple breathing exercise. "Relax," she said softly. "Breathe in the mantra 'I am enough,' and breathe out slowly, releasing the energy of that…
- [Remembering the Life of My Son:](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/remembering-the-life-of-my-son): The Day of the Dead and Healing Grief Content note: This blog references suicide and mental illness. I'm writing this week's blog from Ajijic, Mexico, where I'm spending time during Día de los Muertos—Day of the Dead.…
- [If Nothing Else, Be Kind](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/if-nothing-else-be-kind): At times like these—when wars, cruelty, and suffering flood our daily screens—you may wonder what difference one person can make. The question rises in so many hearts: How can I possibly counterbalance the darkness? What…
- [Awakening Your Challenger Energy](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/awakening-your-challenger-energy): From Persecutor to Challenger Believing in and living from our Creator essence is not a passive way of being—it asks much of us. It asks that we bring light into darkness, tell the truth even when it’s uncomfortable, and…
- [Do You Listen to Your Creator Voice of Love Or the Victim Voice of Fear?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/do-you-listen-to-your-creator-voice-of-love-or-the-victim-voice-of-fear): In my last post , I wrote about the spiritual sickness that has taken hold of our world. Your feedback and encouragement has inspired me to keep writing about how we can together, individually, and collectively help heal…
- [Telling the Truth About Our Spiritual Sickness](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/telling-the-truth-about-our-spiritual-sickness): This week I attended a celebration of life for the former husband of a close friend. Those who spoke at his funeral described him as a deeply spiritual and kind man. When it was the priest’s time to speak, he repeated…
- [Learn to Appreciate What Challenges You:](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/learn-to-appreciate-what-challenges-you): Valuable Lessons May Be Hidden in the Very Situations That Trouble You Most There’s a story about a spiritual community in France led by an influential and inspiring monk. Within this community lived an old man who was…
- [Setting and Maintaining Healthy Boundaries](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/setting-and-maintaining-healthy-boundaries): I have noticed that when things are going well it is easy for me to state what I want and don’t want. I communicate with ease and enjoy the clarity that healthy boundaries provide. I’ve learned that healthy boundaries…
- [Is Your Desire a Calling or a Craving?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/is-your-desire-a-calling-or-a-craving): As a young adult, I began to discover the vast difference between cravings and callings. I often made decisions based on what excited me or stirred my passion, yet I was largely blind to the deeper origins of those…
- [Applying TED* to Youth Sports](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/applying-ted-to-youth-sports): How TED* Helps Teach Character and Not Just Athletic Skills By Donna Zajonc with guest Michael McElhenie, Ph. D. “ Last week I told the story of when I learned to play Pickleball and applied TED* to help me through…
- [Focus on More Helpful Thoughts](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/focus-on-more-helpful-thoughts): Not Just More Positive Ones About ten years ago, I began playing pickleball, the sport that started right here on Bainbridge Island, Washington, where I’ve lived for 25 years. The pickleball community here is vibrant,…
- [More Listening, Less Fixing and Controlling](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/more-listening): How are you Listening? Are you a good listener? Or are you sometimes eager to speak and slow to listen? According to a recent business survey, even though people are frequently texting and checking email when talking…
- [When the Victim Role Can Take Control of the Room](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/when-the-victim-role-can-take-control-of-the-room): The Surprising Power of the Victim Role I had a recent experience and noticed something surprising and more nuanced about the Victim role than I had seen before. I was at a retreat, staying in a community center with…
- [Stop Rescuing. Start Coaching.](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/stop-rescuing-start-coaching): How to Shift from Taking Over to Empowering Others In my early years as a coach and leader, I thought my job was to fix things to make the world a better place. I wanted to ease the burden for others, offer quick advice,…
- [Before You React, Assume Innocent Intent](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/before-you-react-assume-innocent-intent): A Simple Practice That Strengthens Connection and Reduces Drama In a previous blog, I wrote about how all events are neutral and only have the meaning we give them. It is our inner Persecutor voice that loves to rush in…
- [Quieting Your Inner Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/quieting-your-inner-persecutor): Without Tearing Yourself Apart In my last blog I wrote about how all events are neutral, that they only have the meaning we give them. It is the voice of our inner Persecutor that is often the first to declare its…
- [All Events Are Neutral:](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/all-events-are-neutral): They Have Only the Meaning You Give Them I haven’t had a brand-new car in over twenty years. Recently, I purchased a sporty SUV in a gorgeous red color that felt bold and alive. About a month after I bought it, I drove…
- [The Hyper Helper](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-hyper-helper): When Over-Helping Hurts Everyone Of all the three reactive patterns in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT), it is the hyper helper that most aligns with the Rescuer role. Society lifts the helper as a model citizen:…
- [My Favorite TED* Tool](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/favorite-ted-tool): How Naming 5 Red Things Can Get You Out of the Drama Triangle Growth in any area of life begins with awareness, and few moments demand our awareness more than the instant we feel ourselves slipping into the Dreaded Drama…
- [Why Baby Steps Work](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/baby-steps): How Baby Steps are the Secret to Creating Anything In my last blog I wrote about how to leverage the energy in the gap between what you want and what you actually have. I challenged readers to view this energy as…
- [Am I Feeling Anxiety or Tension? Wait—What’s the Difference?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/anxiety-or-tension): If you’ve ever played tug-of-war or stretched a rubber band between two fingers, you’ve felt the unmistakable force that physicists call “tension.” In physics, tension is loosely defined as the pulling or stretching…
- [Trusting the Struggle](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/trusting-the-struggle): Even When It's Super Annoying If you’re alive today, it’s likely that you’re struggling in some way. Never mind the global wars, wildfires—OMG, the list of struggles is so long! But today I’m writing about personal,…
- [TED* Guiding Principles to Repurpose Global Stress and Uncertainty](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ted-guiding-principles-to-repurpose-global-stress-and-uncertainty): Living Your Creator Essence in Time of Turmoil By Donna ZajoncThese times of global unrest and uncertainty won’t last forever, even though it might feel that way if you spend a lot of time watching the news. We are…
- [What Is Your Default Drama Role? A Somatic Self-Inquiry](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/somatic): Most of us know when we’re caught in a reactive loop, but we don’t always realize which role we’re playing in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) roles of Victim, Persecutor, or Rescuer. Some of the most powerful questions…
- [Embracing Your Shadow: Moving from Resistance to Integrating the Creator Essence](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/shadow-2): By Donna ZajoncWhile I’m not a psychologist, I’ve followed Carl Jung’s brilliant work for many years. What I appreciate most about his teachings is how clearly he named the “shadow” within us—the unconscious, often…
- [The Long Arc of Human Awakening: Planting Seeds for Seven Generations](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/seeds): By Donna ZajoncWhen David Emerald created The Empowerment Dynamic (TED*), he wasn’t simply developing a model to escape the Drama Triangle. He was planting seeds—seeds he hoped would blossom long after his lifetime.…
- [The Power of the Pause: What Do You Focus On?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/power-of-the-pause): By Donna ZajoncFour weeks ago, our beloved co-founder and visionary, David Emerald, peacefully left this earth. His sudden passing has ushered in a transition time unlike any other for those of us who loved him—and for…
- [Let Today Mark the End of Victim Consciousness](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/victim-consciousness): By Donna Zajonc There is a seismic shift available to each of us the moment we decide to end Victim consciousness —the established mindset that believes life’s events define and confine us. We all endure genuine…
- [Trusting the Fertile Void](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/fertile-void): By Donna Zajonc As I sit with the loss and change that David’s passing brings, I also feel called to reflect through the lens of The Power of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) , the very framework David created and lived…
- [The Evolution of a Creator](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-evolution-of-a-creator): By Donna Zajonc As I write this week’s post, my thoughts continue to rest on David’s life and legacy. Today I want to share with you more about him and his evolution as a Creator. David left this earth on April 16 in the…
- [Honoring the Life and Legacy of David Emerald](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/life-legacy-david-emerald): A Message from Donna Zajonc It is with a full heart and deep sadness that I share the sudden passing of David Emerald Womeldorff, beloved friend, teacher, partner, and the creator of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic).…
- [How to Live a Path of Personal Empowerment](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/personal-empowerment-path): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald The word spirituality means different things to different people. For many, non-religious spirituality centers on personal growth, inner peace, and mindful presence. At its core, there…
- [Creativity is the Antidote to Anxiety](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/anxiety-antidote): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald The level of disruption and uncertainty in the world right now is causing a lot of anxiety. There’s a nervous vibration that heightens our emotions of fear and unease. Our human brains…
- [The Cost of Rescuing](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-cost-of-rescuing): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald People often tell me that the Rescuer is the “best” role in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) because it’s the helpful one—the one that steps in, fixes the problem, and saves the day.…
- [The Hidden Gifts of the Inner Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/hidden-gifts): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald In recent blogs, I’ve written about becoming more aware of the subtle voices of Victim thinking and the many complaints I hear chattering away in my mind. This week, the voice I heard…
- [How Complaining Can Uncover What Truly Matters](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/uncover): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald In my last blog I wrote about how the subtle nature of Victim thinking can creep into my consciousness. I told a personal story about feeling like a Victim to travel delays and blaming…
- [Recognizing the Subtle Nature of Victim Thinking](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/victim-thinking): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald Having studied and applied the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) in my coaching business for many years, I am very familiar with the Victim role. I recently had an experience that brought me…
- [The Many Forms of Arrogance: More Than Just a “Nose-in-the-Air”](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/arrogance): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald I am a recovering Rescuer. I am referring to the role in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) that focuses on pleasing and being helpful. During my recovery, I began to realize that my…
- [How to be a Compassionate Challenger](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/compassionate-challenger): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald I recently facilitated a one-hour workshop to introduce the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) and TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® frameworks to a small group. After a brief explanation, I…
- [If You Had What You Say You Want, Would You Take It?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/want): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald When one gets clear about what they want, it is the first step in the journey from Victim to Creator. At least that is what I believed until I spent several months coaching a high-level…
- [Stop Focusing on Problems. Here’s a Better Approach](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/better-approach): By Donna Zajonc with David Emerald When you pause and ask yourself what you want, you clarify the outcome you really care about and begin walking the path of a Creator, the foundational role in TED* (*The Empowerment…
- [Put on Your Own Oxygen Mask First](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/oxygen-mask): https://theempowermentdynamic.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/2.7.2025.mp3 When people first learn about TED* (The Empowerment Dynamic) ® , one of the most common reactions is thinking about how they can use the framework…
- [Personal Empowerment Is an Inside Job](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/personal-empowerment): By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldI was not a good student. In elementary school I had trouble reading and felt ashamed that I was always put in the second or third reading groups. I was self-critical and worried that I…
- [How To Be an Empowering Thought Partner](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/thought-partner): By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldI used to cringe when someone would say to me, “I’d like to give you some feedback.” My gut would tighten, and I would armor up, preparing to defend myself. I assumed, in those days,…
- [The Key to Nurturing Lasting Relationships](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/lasting-relationships): By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldPeople are wired to connect and have a natural desire to be in positive relationships. But relationships are not always easy. Our focus here, at the Center for The Empowerment Dynamic ,…
- [Buckle Up! 2025 Will Be a Wild Ride](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/buckle-up): By Donna Zajonc with David EmeraldBy all accounts, 2025 is going to be a wild ride. It’s not that the last few years have been a piece of cake but, if projections hold true, new challenges and the pace of life will be…
- [Outcomes First, Then Goals](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/outcomes-goals): The New Year is a common time to set new goals. However, declaring your desired outcomes are far more effective. You might be asking, “What’s the difference between an outcome and a goal? Aren’t they the same thing?”…
- [Year-End Reflection: Embracing Your Inner-Creator in 2024](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/2024-reflections): As we prepare to welcome 2025, we want to take a moment to reflect on the journey through 2024. In a world full of constant change, we've faced challenges and embraced opportunities to grow as Creators. As we say goodbye…
- [No Night, No Light](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/no-night-no-light): This week in the Northern hemisphere is the Winter Solstice. This is the shortest day of the year and signals the return of the light. The daylight is brief, paired with long dark nights. And for our friends in the…
- [How to Connect Beyond Words](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/connect-beyond-words): As a professional coach for almost 25 years, I (Donna) deeply value the gift of listening—not to just the words spoken, but to the underlying emotions, aspirations, and unspoken thoughts with whom I wish to connect. This…
- [Transformation Is a Thing](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/transformation): This week's TED* Works! blog is written by Jessica Albert. A mom of two young boys, wife, friend, engineer, lover of life, ultimate bookworm extraordinaire who is absolutely obsessed with the power of transformation…
- [Listen for That Still Whisper](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/still-whisper): If you stop and listen, it is amazing how many voices you may hear inside your mind. Becoming aware of these voices is part of the mysterious experience that makes us conscious human beings. It can also be confusing to…
- [What Brings You Joy?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/what-brings-you-joy): When you rest in the vibration of joy, you are shaping your mind to help keep your heart open, humble, and more grateful. Without joy, the grasping mind focuses on lack and limitation, which can lead to feeling…
- [We'll See](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/well-see): One thing has become abundantly clear these last few years – life is uncertain. Human beings are the only species that can imagine a future, which can serve you well when planning and creating a general direction for…
- [Slow Down and Take It Easy](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/take-it-easy): Our human bodies were not built for this pace of life. We all feel it. Things are moving faster and faster. You may hope that life will someday get back to normal, but there is no evidence that modern life will slow…
- [Bystander or Witness?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/bystander-witness): This week's guest blog is written by Lynn Thorsell, an avid TED* Works! reader and coach & consultant at Lathyrus Leadership _____________________________I feel lost and I don’t know what to do. Physically, I know…
- [That Pesky Inner Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/pesky-inner-persecutor): Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you will ever have. How you relate to yourself will have a big impact on how you relate to others. Freeing yourself from the influence of that pesky…
- [Escaping the Cycle of Seeking Validation](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/seeking-validation): Escaping the cycle of validation is deeply rooted in the Rescuer role of the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT). If Rescuer is your “go to” role in the DDT, being helpful and pleasing to others may be your primary…
- [Applying TED* to Difficult Conversations](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/conversations): In today’s world of social media and heated debates, controversial topics can provoke strong emotional reactions. Difficult conversations can cause you to defend your stance, dismiss the other perspective, or even feel…
- [Embracing Our Humanity in Times of Challenge](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/embracing-humanity): Life often presents unexpected hardships that can shake us to our core. We are all aware of the devastating wars and the unspeakable tragedies from recent hurricanes in the US and flooding in many parts of the world. You…
- [Self-Awareness Without Compassion is Warfare](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/self-awareness): A colleague once said: “Oh, the curse of self-awareness. Sometimes it’s easier to not know the reasons why I do things and just go blindly through life.”Sometimes blindness is wonderful, because waking up and becoming…
- [TED* and Spirituality](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ted-spirituality): I ( Donna) have been thinking about this topic for a long time. I am pleased, now, to share some of my reflections. The word spirituality can be open to a wide range of interpretations. In general, spirituality is…
- [Like Attracts Like](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/like-attracts-like): The principle “like attracts like” is sometimes referred to as the law of attraction and affects all your energy, especially your thoughts. Even though you might not realize it, you think your thoughts, which means you…
- [Letting Go of the Need to Control](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/need-to-control): https://theempowermentdynamic.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/Control.mp3There is a popular story about a corporate executive who proudly declared to his professional coach that he had learned how to control everything…
- [Setting Healthy Boundaries](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/healthy-boundaries): https://theempowermentdynamic.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/setting-healthy-boundaries-masculine.mp3Setting healthy boundaries is essential to shift from drama to empowerment. But why is it sometimes so difficult to set…
- [The “Do-Over” Practice](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/do-over): Watching a young toddler play the “peek-a-boo” game is such joy. It’s the laughter and connection that elicits the giggles each time the toddler yells, “Do it again!”Wouldn’t it be great if you could take a “do-over”…
- [Practice the Pause](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/practice-the-pause): When drama hits, if you are like most people, you may seek relief from the stressors that triggered your reaction. This is because your body is wired to soothe discomfort by any means necessary. You may choose to…
- [Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/shoe-to-drop): Have you ever wondered about the origins of the saying “waiting for the other shoe to drop?”It began in the early 1900’s with poorly constructed buildings in the U. S. that had very thin floors and walls. At night,…
- [Embrace Your Drama](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/embrace-your-drama): It happens all the time in workshops, coaching sessions, and conversations about shifting out of the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT). People are excited to learn more about how to stop living in their drama roles. The…
- [This Creator’s Imposter Syndrome](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/imposter-syndrome): Last week, I ( David ) was a participant in a gathering of friends and colleagues. We explored the ups and downs of living and working as consciously as possible, even in a world full of chaos and rapid changes. At one…
- [See Everyone as a Creator](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/see-creators): The central role of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® is that of a Creator. There are two primary actions of a Creator. The first is owning your power to choose your response to life’s challenges, regardless of the…
- [The 3 N’s – Notice, Name, and Normalize](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-3-ns): Have you ever been so upset that you feel like you are “losing your mind?” With all that is happening in the world today, many people feel they are not thinking straight and can easily get caught up in their reactive…
- [Freedom From the Inside Out](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/freedom-inside-out): The month of July hosts several Independence Day celebrations around the world. July 1st was Canada’s Independence Day and the “4th of July” is recognized as Independence Day in the US. Global disruptions are showing the…
- [Community is a Verb](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/community-is-a-verb): When you hear the word community, what comes to your mind? You may feel a special connection, or the possibility of hanging out with like-minded people. Merely being a “member” of a community, however, can miss an…
- [Creating and Uncertainty](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/creating-and-uncertainty): We can all agree that uncertainty is a part of the human experience. As much as you may try to control variables, seek secure investments (whether in time, money, or relationships), there will always be some level of…
- [Reframing Self-Criticism](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/reframing-self-criticism): The way you frame your thoughts and the words you say to yourself play a critical role in shaping your life experiences. When you get stuck in a cycle of negative self-talk and criticism, you have the choice to reframe…
- [The Challenger’s Beliefs & Intention](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/challenger-beliefs): Of the three TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® roles of Creator, Challenger, and Coach, we receive the most questions about the Challenger. Readers tell us they resist embracing the Challenger role because they view it as…
- [3 Signs Your Creator Self Is Emerging](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/creator-self-emerging): Many of us stay in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) roles during our life more than we'd like to admit. What most of us don't realize is that our true self—that part of us we call our Creator essence and the primary role…
- [The Accidental Mess-Maker](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/mess-maker): “When I try to Rescue people, I become the accidental mess-maker.”That heart-felt admission came from a seasoned human resource professional during an online coaching course that Donna was facilitating. She had read…
- [The Problem with Resilience](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/problem-with-resilience): This blog is written by Heather Fitzgerald, DBe, MS, RN. Heather is a 3 Vital Questions ® Certified Trainer and Director of the Office of Professional Fulfilment & Resilience at Stanford Medicine Children’s…
- [Why Forgiving Is So Hard](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/forgiving): Human beings are wired to connect and have a natural desire to be in positive relationships with others. But relationships are not always “goodness and light.” Whether at home or work, even the most trusting…
- [The Origin Epiphany](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/the-origin-epiphany): I (David) am often asked about the genesis of what eventually became the book, The Power of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) . The following is my personal story that led to the story in the book. At a critical time in my…
- [Empowerment Bypass](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/empowerment-bypass): If you come upon a traffic jam, you may check your phone and highway app to locate a faster way around the gridlock. You see a new route that looks longer but hopefully, you will make better time. You would rather take…
- [Transforming Your Negative Inner Dialogue](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/tranforming-inner-dialogue): We all do it. We talk to ourselves. Having an inner dialogue with ourselves is often called “self-talk.” It is one of the unique characteristics that gives human beings the ability to reason and think about situations.…
- [Face It—You Cannot Change Other People](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/face-it): The first question many people ask after learning about the shift from drama to TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® is, “These ideas are so helpful. How do I get other people to change?”There’s often a collective groan…
- [Choice Points Can Come When You Least Expect Them](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/unexpected-choice-points): This blog was written by Debbie Hulbert, our Director of Communications and Customer Service and long-time TED* advocate._________________________________________I recently visited my local grocery store where I’ve…
- [Going to the Balcony](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/balcony): As you read this blog, pause for a moment, and observe yourself. Where are you sitting or standing? How are you feeling (mad, glad, sad, excited, etc.)? How are you reacting to this unusual start to the blog? Do you want…
- [Weaponizing TED*](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/weaponizing-ted): When people learn about the Dreaded Drama Triangles roles of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer, almost always the first thing they ask is, “How do I get myself out of these roles?”When TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)®…
- [The “I Know” vs “I Learn” Mindset](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/mindsets): One of the faster ways to put yourself into a drama relationship with yourself and others is to pretend you know something when you don’t. If you pretend you know how to fix your busted computer, when you don’t know how,…
- [The Perilous Path of Positive Thinking](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/positive-thinking): When difficult things happen, one common approach is to stay overly positive and force yourself to look on the bright side. You might hear yourself say, “Everything happens for a reason. My job is to stay positive.”The…
- [Escaping the Need-to-Please Trap](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/need-to-please-trap): Escaping the “need-to-please” trap is deeply rooted in the Rescuer role of the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) and it can be a long journey. If Rescuer is your “go-to” role in the DDT, you may see being helpful and pleasing…
- [Working with Someone Caught in Victim Thinking](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/support-with-victim-thinking): Working with people stuck in the Victim role can be exhausting and infuriating. When they have a problem, their thinking defaults to who or what is to blame rather than realizing that they have power to choose their…
- [How Meeting TED* Transformed My Life](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/meeting-ted): This week's blog is written by Sheri Lawrence, a Certified 3 Vital Questions® Trainer ._________________________________________I am a strong, confident, and resilient Creator! I can say this now, as I approach my 12 th…
- [Self-Care is Love in Action](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/love-in-action): lIt's brave and courageous to commit to a self-care practice, even though this is not how our society, or most people view self-care. Many cultural messages assert that self-care is indulgent and selfish. If you have…
- [The Courage to Make Friends with Your Inner Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/courage): Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you will ever have. How you relate to yourself will have a big impact on how you relate to others. Freeing yourself from the influence of the inner…
- [How You Can Feel Victimized by Goals](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/victimized-by-goals): “Once I reach my goal, I will be happy,” is what most people say when they set a goal. What is problematic about this approach to life is the idea that your happiness is somewhere in the future and not available to you…
- [3 Levels of Appreciation](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/3-levels): These times are very difficult and many people are feeling distress in the wake of so many wars and tragedies. You may have concluded there’s little you can do to help and, as a result, you may feel numb or indifferent.…
- [Create More Authentic Moments](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/authentic-moments): Each year the folks at Merriam-Webster pick a word for the year. They analyze the look-up volume on their dictionary website and determine a word that had a substantially higher search rate for that year. For example,…
- [How TED* Helped Create Our “Great Year”](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/our-great-year): Guest blog by Steve Gibbons; certified 3VQ Trainer and leadership coach._______________________________________On New Year's Eve one year ago, I stood in the Coki beach surf, with the warm sun on my face, 3600 miles away…
- [3 Popular Blogs of 2023](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/3-popular-blogs-of-2023): As we prepare to ring in the new year we want to pause and reflect back on 2023. The world is ever-changing with many ups and downs, yet as Creators, we hopefully took the Challengers in stride and were able to grow and…
- [Return of the Light](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/return-of-the-light): If it wasn’t for the darkness, we wouldn’t see the star-lit night. When we fall into the dark and drama-filled times in our own lives, it feels like we will never get through them. It can seem like a long day’s journey…
- [What Is Your Mindset When Giving?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/giving-mindset): The holiday season is here, and it is a good time to reflect upon your relationship with giving. There are many clichés about giving. Here are a few: If you want to receive more, you must give more. It is in giving that…
- [Recovering From Appeasing](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/recovering-from-appeasing): This blog is written by Cheri Neal; 3VQ Certified Trainer ._______________________________________What skills are you proud of, that you put time and attention into polishing? Imagine being immersed in a training full of…
- [Not Your Typical Victim](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/not-your-typical-victim): This week's blog is written by an avid TED* Works! reader and long-time TED* advocate, Barb Nangle. Barb, thank you for sharing your powerful story.__________________________________________In 2015, at the age of 52, I…
- [If Nothing Else, Be Kind](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/be-kind): At times like this, when wars and graphic violence are displayed every day on the news and social media, you may wonder what you can do. You may ask, “How can I make a difference given all that is wrong in the world?…
- [Gratitude Now More Than Ever](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/gratitude-now): Next Thursday in the United States we celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday. This is a time to gather with friends and family, share a traditional meal, and express gratitude for all that is good in life. Gratitude is an…
- [Baby Steps in Challenging Times](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/baby-steps-in-challenging-times): Living as a Creator is not always easy, especially during challenging times. The reality is we are living in a very difficult period, yet everyday choices and decisions must still be made. The US recently went off…
- [How A Creator Speaks](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/creator-speaks): Your brain believes what you tell it—both consciously and unconsciously. Your thoughts and the words you speak stimulate a chemical reaction in your nervous system to respond to what you are thinking and saying. For…
- [Embracing Our Shadow](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/shadow): Halloween is celebrated around the world next week. It is a festive holiday that has its roots in various folk legends and religious rituals, including the “Day of the Dead,” which is a popular Latin holiday. In secular…
- [Ask “What” More Than “Why”](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ask-what): As you read the following questions, what emotions arise in you? Why are you always late for the staff meetings? Why are your monthly reports filled with client complaints? Why do you avoid helping me with the dishes?…
- [Your Golden Creator Essence](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/golden-buddha): There are times in our lives where something important is hiding in plain sight. A story that illustrates this is the true story of the Golden Buddha. Located in Bangkok, Thailand, the origins of the statue are…
- [The Challenger Role](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/challenger-role): The Challenger role in TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® is the antidote to the Dreaded Drama Triangle role of Persecutor. As a result, many people resist stepping into the Challenger role, worried they might be viewed…
- [The Many Faces of the Persecutor](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/faces-of-persecutor): During workshops, we often ask the group to describe the Persecutor role, one of the three roles that make up the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT). Participants often use words like angry, controlling, critical, and bossy.…
- [Creator’s Choice](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/creators-choice): The journey from Victim consciousness to Creator consciousness is not always easy, nor does it travel along a straight line. We prefer to think of it as a continuum, with your center of gravity gradually moving away from…
- [Race To Occupy the Victim Role](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/race-to-victim): How do conflicts begin? In general, conflicts begin in relationships when each side races to occupy the Victim position. Here is typically what happens: The first person or group claims a Victim position by saying to the…
- [How TED* Transformed My Teaching](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/how-ted-transformed-my-teaching): Guest blog written by long-time friend, Certified TED* Coach, and 3VQ Certified Trainer, Christy Vincent, Ph. D._________________________________I was disheartened to read the student reviews I received from the…
- [Lessons from Pickleball](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/lessons-from-pickleball): This past summer, I ( David ) played a lot of outdoor pickleball. Several weeks ago, there was a local tournament called the Founder's Tournament, which had 480 participants from around the world. It is called the…
- [There Are No Don'ts – Only Dos](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/there-are-no-donts-only-dos): I, Donna , love baseball. I grew up playing baseball in the backyard of our small rural family home. When the neighborhood boys were old enough to play Little League, I was left without a team since girls were not…
- [GEFN—Good Enough For Now](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/good-enough): Imagine you are on a telephone call talking with a co-worker about a project the two of you are working on. At the end of the call your colleague says with some tremor in her voice, “I will have the project summary to…
- [Vulnerability is Rewarded or Punished](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/psychological-safety): There is a lot of conversation these days about psychological safety. What is it, and how do we create it? To quote Dr. Timothy Clark, you can sum it up in five words; “ Psychological safety is an environment of rewarded…
- [Assume Innocent Intent](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/innocent-intent): Picture this scene: You are rushing out the door from work heading to soccer practice to pick up your young daughter. Your boss catches you and says, “We really need your project report in the morning.”“Sure,” you say,…
- [The Many Faces of The Victim Role](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/many-faces-of-the-victim): From time to time everyone experiences the feeling of being powerless to life’s challenges. When you feel powerless there is a good chance you will take on a Victim mentality, believing your hopes and dreams will never…
- [Stuck in Habitual Pleasing](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/habitual-pleasing): The need to please others is one of the most important social skills for all human beings. Appropriately pleasing one another keeps us connected and helps us to survive and thrive together. The challenge comes when your…
- [Do You Pause to be Right or More Resourceful?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/purpose-of-pause): Many people report that when they feel triggered and at risk of going reactive, they take a moment to pause, hoping they can avoid sinking into the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) . When you pause for a moment, what is the…
- [Activating Your Inner Freedom](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/inner-freedom): The month of July hosts several Independence Day celebrations around the world. July 1 st is Canada’s Independence Day and, in the US, “4 th of July” is a celebration of the adoption of the Declaration of Independence,…
- [Skip The Drama](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/skip-the-drama): When we hold in-person multi-day workshops , at the end of the first day we ask participants to “stay tuned” to their experiences during the evening and simply notice how the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) and its roles of…
- [Hope is a Strategic Advantage](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/strategic-advantage): Guest Blog Written By Andrew BennettAndrew Bennett is a long-time friend and colleague of David’s, and we are thrilled to share this essay that was originally published on…
- [This Father’s Gratitude](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/this-fathers-gratitude): This weekend is Father’s Day in the United States and many other countries around the world. It is a day to express gratitude for fathers or father figures who have had a positive impact on your life. I ( David ) am…
- [The Unhelpful Helper](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/unhelpful-helper): It's a wonderful thing to want to help others. Thank goodness there are many in this world who are sensitive, caring, and helpful people. However, if your constant focus is to be a helper, you may pay a heavy cost…
- [You Cannot Not Create](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/you-cannot-not-create): Creating is in the basic nature of being human. It is not reserved only for those who call themselves artists, musicians, and writers. Everyone creates. You engage in the act of creating every day when you bring…
- [How TED* Can Transform Anger](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ted-transforms): This blog is written by Bob Brinker M. A. Bob is a long-time subscriber to TED* Works!® who wrote to us about how he uses TED* as a counselor. I have lost track of when I first became aware of the Karpman Drama Triangle…
- [Make Valuable Deposits in Your Emotional Bank Account](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/emotional-deposits): In a recent conversation, a good friend raved about the CEO in his global consulting firm. He said that the CEO had always been rather cold and aloof and rarely shared personal information, but he had changed in his…
- [How to be Grateful Even When Problems Arise](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/grateful): When “just be grateful” is used to offset every difficult situation, it can become a cliché or even trivialized. The truth is, gratitude cultivates more effective outcomes. It’s not just a sweet sentiment. It’s a…
- [Victimization vs Victimhood](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/victimization-vs-victimhood): The Victim role is the central role in the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT). There are absolutely times we all have felt like a Victim in the world, but there’s a profound difference between victimization and victimhood. Let…
- [How TED* Became My Rescuer](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/my-rescuer): We are delighted to share this week's TED* Works! ® blog, written by long-time colleague and 3VQ Certified Trainer, Jennifer Herold . In the early years of my introduction and work with the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT)…
- [3 Ways of Applying TED*](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/applying-ted): For almost 20 years we have shared TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® with people and have noticed there tends to be 3 ways people use the framework. This is not a scientific study—simply our observation of how people…
- [How Your Mind Really Works](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/your-mind): Most people think that their thoughts and feelings arise from external events and circumstances. Here are examples of how most of us talk about events, as though the event itself is the cause of our feelings: “The…
- [I Didn’t Feel So Alone Anymore](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/not-alone): We are delighted to share this week's TED* Works! ® blog, written by one of our colleagues and 3VQ Certified Trainer, Dave Sinclair. The first time I heard about TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® was shortly after I…
- [Learn to Let Go of Worry](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/let-go-of-worry): Anxiety and worry are emotions that many people deal with, at some level, almost every day. If you get lost in these heavy emotions, it is easy to lose sight of what matters most—what you really want to create in life.…
- [What Triggers You, Can Transform You](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/triggers): We all have experienced triggers. Something happens, usually something small, and you suddenly feel flushed and are a ball of nerves. It may have been a puzzling look on your boss’s face that triggered a whole-body…
- [The Value of Struggling](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/struggling): Everyone struggles with issues from time to time. The question is how do you work with something that you are struggling with? When something arises that has you struggling, you might look at what is going on, and then…
- [How TED* Saved My Life](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/surviving-aggressive-cancer): We are delighted to share this week's TED* Works! ® blog which is written by our very own Co-Creator, Debbie Hulbert (Director of Communications and Customer Experience) . She has been a member of the TED* Team for 18…
- [What Story About Life Do You Tell?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/story): Those who study human behavior describe two primary ways of seeing life. This approach is sometimes called the “human iceberg effect,” because most people can explain their beliefs that are above the water line but are…
- [Drama is Not a Problem to Solve](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/drama): It happens all the time in workshops, coaching sessions, and conversations. It happened again last year when I (David) and a colleague facilitated our first live 2-day workshop since the pandemic. The participants had…
- [A Journey of Recovery (A Reader's Story)](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/journey-of-recovery): This is another installment of stories from our readers about how TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® has impacted their lives. In this story, an anonymous reader shares her journey from Victim to Creator through the…
- [If Rescuer Was A Person, What Would They Be Like?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/inner-dialogue): We are delighted to share this week's TED* Works! blog, written by our long-time colleague, Paul Wyman. When I first learned about the Drama Triangle, I firmly believed that my Victim, Rescuer, and Persecutor were my…
- [Transforming Your Drama](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/transform): When we first started using the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) to help us observe our own drama, both personally and professionally, we asked some basic questions like “How did this drama get started in the first place?”…
- [Emotions are Contagious Too!](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/emotions): Many of us have seen the graphic photos of someone sneezing with thousands of droplets projecting into the air. The contagious nature of this virus is certainly a huge part of the pandemic, and the flu and cold season.…
- [A Calling or a Craving?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/calling-or-craving): If you are reading this blog, you are likely a person who wants to be more self-aware and to embrace your deeper desires. Each new year, it is common to reflect upon what you most care about. As you reflect, an important…
- [Words Matter (An Apology)](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/apology): Challengers call forth learning and growth – and we have had several readers do just that in response to the title of today’s blog “Slavery to Goals.” We are humbled and a little ashamed that our enthusiasm for our first…
- [Slavery to Goals (A Reader’s Story)](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/clarify): Last week we announced we will be sharing more stories from our readers about how TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) has impacted their lives. This is the first story. We received it in response to last week’s “ Don’t Let…
- [Don’t Let Goals Ruin Your Life](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/goals): Setting goals is a valuable practice and many of us set them as “resolutions” in the New Year. Goals are essential for completing tasks, whether it is developing a new business skill or cleaning your closet. However,…
- [3 Popular Blogs of 2022](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/2022-2): As we prepare to ring in the new year we want to pause and reflect back on 2022. There were many ups and downs, yet as Creators, we hopefully took the Challengers in stride and were able to grow and learn. As we say…
- [The Darkness Illuminates the Light](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/light): If it wasn’t for the darkness, we wouldn’t see the star-lit night. When we fall into the dark and drama-filled times in our own lives, it feels like we will never get through them. It can seem like a long day’s journey…
- [Two Intentions: One Builds Up the Other Tears Down](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/two-intentions): Intentions direct why you say or do anything—consciously or unconsciously. Intention, then, guides your action. Therefore, your intention informs both your action and your attitude toward that action. The pace of life…
- [How Might I Be Wrong?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/how-might-i-be-wrong): Each of us has the capacity to optimize our life experience so that we are aligned with our true essence and unlimited potential as a Creator. We don’t need to remain in fixed patterns of reactivity and drama. Once we…
- [The Power of a Purposeful Pause](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/purposeful-pause): One of the most powerful gifts you can give yourself this holiday season is to take purposeful pauses throughout your day. When people first learn about the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT), they tell us how the DDT…
- [A New Way to Cultivate Gratitude](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/cultivate-gratitude): This week is the Thanksgiving holiday in the United States. Thanksgiving is our favorite holiday because it celebrates an attitude of gratitude—one of the most important practices to cultivate as a Creator. During the…
- [Put Yourself in the Presence of Beauty](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/beauty): At first thought it may seem like a relatively unimportant idea to add more beauty to your life. However, from the point of reference that you want to reduce drama and troublesome emotions, it can make a world of…
- [Challengers Challenge Assumptions](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/challenge): You learn from experience. Right? From the lessons of experience, you form and derive assumptions upon which you base your approaches to working and interacting with others. Assumptions can be extremely useful. They…
- [Do You Ruminate on Mistakes or Let Go and Learn?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ruminate): Many of you may know that I (Donna) am a baseball fan. As a young girl, I played softball, the only sport available to girls in our small Missouri town. I continue to enjoy the finer points of the game. Last week I…
- [The Rescuer’s Dilemma](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/rescuers-dilemma): The Rescuer role is one of the three roles that make up the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) . When in the Rescuer role you feel the strong urge to help others so they don’t suffer or feel bad. In a nutshell, Rescuers are…
- [The Creator Voice Whispers—The Victim Voice Shouts](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/whispers): If you stop and listen, it is amazing how many voices you may hear inside your mind. Becoming aware of these voices is part of the mysterious experience that makes us conscious human beings. It can also be confusing to…
- [Becoming a Conscious Constructive Challenger](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/constructive-challenger): We have found that many people resist embracing the Challenger role in TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® because they view it as risky or scary. “If I am a Challenger, I won’t be liked by my co-workers or family members.…
- [To Get Good, Be Enthusiastic About Being Bad](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/being-bad): Last week David facilitated two days of leadership programs for a financial services company. During the retreat, there was rich conversation about TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ® and the 3 Vital Questions ® —…
- [Post-Traumatic Stress or Post-Traumatic Growth?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/ptg): A good friend and colleague recently experienced a sudden and traumatic professional change. Last year she was recruited by the owners of a company to lead a new initiative. The new career direction was an answer to her…
- [The Problem with Problem Solving](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/problem-solving): Solving a problem works well when you need specific information. If your computer isn’t working, you need concrete information about how to get it working again. If you have the wrong address for an appointment, that’s a…
- [Slow Down!](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/slow-down-2): Could it be that the secret to being a kinder and gentler person is to simply slow down? A research experiment looked at how rushing and being in a hurry affects how we relate to others in need. The results may astonish…
- [Give Up the “Justs, Buts, and Maybes”—Speak with Empowered Language](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/empowered-language): Words carry energy. By listening to your language, you can increase your awareness of unconscious speech patterns that may keep you trapped in old and limiting stories about yourself. It matters what you say to yourself…
- [What If You Let Go of Your Need to Control?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/control): There is a popular story about a corporate executive who proudly declared to his professional coach that he had learned how to control everything that went on in his department. Sensing that the executive truly believed…
- [What Story Will You Tell About These Times?](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/your-story): A client called to share that his company was being bought by another company. While the news was good in many ways, some of his staff were caught off guard and felt victimized by the sudden news. He wanted additional…
- [Healthy Boundaries: More Important Than Ever](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/healthy-boundaries-more-important-than-ever): Why is it so hard to set healthy boundaries? The answer is unique to each person. One thing is for sure, the pandemic and global disruption has made it important to establish healthy boundaries now more than ever. A…
- [Choosing Intentional Thoughts](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/choosing-intentional-thoughts): There really are only two kinds of thoughts: the thoughts you intentionally create, and those that are unconscious and automatic. When you notice an automatic negative thought and replace it with an intentional thought,…
- [4 Tips to “Let Go” and Lighten Up](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/let-go): It is perhaps an understatement to say that current situations around the world have many of us worried and uptight. We’re all experiencing situations we want to change and wish they were different than they really are.…
- [You Don’t Have to Believe Your Negative Thoughts](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/negative-thoughts): We humans have thousands of tedious and ongoing thoughts happening all day. Psychologists have shown that the human mind has over 60,000 thoughts each day and often most of those thoughts are negative. Thank goodness you…
- [Victimized by Hope](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/hope): The emotion of hope is one of the most important and positive emotions available to human beings. When facing difficult times, hope keeps us moving forward. But for many, hope has been especially elusive the last couple…
- [There’s More Than Two Ways to Work with Fear](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/fear): There are two options that describe the way most people work with their fears. The first option is to ignore fear and hope it goes away. Suppressing your fears doesn’t work well because the energy will be stored…
- [An Infrastructure for Empowered Relationships](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/infrastructure): By David Emerald & Donna Zajonc It is not until you hit a deep pothole that you know how essential good roads are to keeping your car in good condition. When you experience a road detour because a bridge needs repair you…

## Machine-readable indexes

- [Sitemap](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/sitemap.xml)
- [Live sitemap](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/api/sitemap.xml)
- [Live content index](https://theempowermentdynamic.com/api/llms.txt)