The journey from Victim consciousness to Creator consciousness is not always easy, nor does it travel along a straight line. We prefer to think of it as a continuum, with your center of gravity gradually moving away from the disempowering Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) roles and closer to the empowering roles of TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)®.
As you make the shift from the DDT to TED*, you are upgrading your “internal operating system” from automatic reactive habits to choosing your response to life’s challenges.
If you become mired in the Victim role, a “deficiency story” takes hold and you feel insufficient or powerless to whatever is happening. When living as a Creator, you upgrade your deficiency story to a Creator story. This upgrade is not a small shift. In fact, it may be the most profound shift you make in your life because it will alter your relationship with yourself, loved ones, co-workers, and all of life.
David was once asked what the central principle of being a Creator is, to which he replied, “Creators choose choice.” How do you shift from reacting to choosing — from deficiency to sufficiency? There are three primary beliefs that support the emergence of your Creator.
Choice #1: I am sufficient, whole, and complete.
Rewrite your deficiency story and affirm your Creator essence. Father Richard Rohr, Founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation, recommends a process to begin this transition. Think of a negative phrase you have said aloud or thought to yourself that comes from a sense of shame rather than your inherent dignity. Turn it upside down and say in first person, present tense, an affirmation of your (Creator) value.
“I am unlovable” shifts to “I am infinitely loved.”
Or, “I am a problem in the world” becomes “I am a gift and solution in the world.”
Creators deeply “know” their true essence as love and wholeness for themselves and other Creators.
Choice #2: I am responsible for choosing my response to life.
If you believe you are whole and complete, it stands to reason that you no longer view yourself as at the mercy of life’s events. You can now choose your response.
Viktor Frankl, who survived three Nazi concentration camps writes in his amazing book, A Man’s Search for Meaning:
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
As a Creator, you can learn to pause and be aware of the space that exists between the incoming stimulus and your response. Relaxing in this space builds your capacity to be at choice, rather than allowing the moment to overwhelm you.
Choice #3: Even with setbacks and struggles, I focus on continuous learning.
If you take responsibility for your response to life’s events, you spend less time and energy trying to change situations that you can’t control. Once you accept that you don’t know how things are going to turn out, you have more energy to learn and grow rather than resist reality.
Now, as a Creator, you can focus on what you desire in life—what rocks your world and what you truly care about. With this new orientation to life, setbacks and struggles become learning opportunities and you are no longer a Victim to life’s difficult moments.
When you choose to live and act as a Creator, you will relate to others, yourself, and life with a whole new operating system based upon your highest and true self.