In last week’s “TED* Works!®” we wrote about the all-important question, “What do you want?” as the key question to ask to shift out of the problem-focused, anxiety-based, and reactive Victim Orientation. Once you, your team, or family is entrenched in focusing on what you don’t like and don’t want, it explains why getting stuck […]
What do you want? This is often a question that is more easily asked than answered. If you are like most people, you know what you don’t want, more than what you do want. When an individual or team is first asked this question in our workshops, it is not unusual to get a “deer […]
There’s a fine line between being supportive and being overly helpful. Once you slip into over-helpful mode, you don’t have a choice to act. Your desire to be helpful becomes a craving, maybe even a compulsion. In this fast-paced world many of us “over-do” and become vigilant about what might go wrong. As soon as […]
“You are always at choice.” This is a declaration we make regularly in workshops and presentations. It is also a statement that many people often disagree with. Most of their push backs begin with this phrase: “But what about…” It is sometimes very hard to remember that no matter the outside circumstances, you are still […]
Two weeks ago, we wrote about the Victim-to-Creator shift and last week the Persecutor-to-Challenger shift. This week we describe the Coach role, which is the positive alternative, or antidote, to the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) role of Rescuer. Together, the three TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® roles represent the best of who you are as a human being. A […]
Of the three TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® roles of Creator, Challenger, and Coach, we receive the most questions about the shift from the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) role of Persecutor to Challenger. We humans have a strong tendency to judge others and be critical of ourselves. While being a Persecutor to others may be what […]
When David first learned about the Karpman Drama Triangle and its roles of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer many years ago, he knew he had lived much of his life from a Victim point of view. One day in quiet time he asked: “Okay God. I don’t want to live my life as a Victim anymore, […]
Yes, laughing matters, and is probably more important than ever given the challenges in the world. If you are paying attention to the news most events are not laughing matters! A deep belly laugh, though, is a valuable way to navigate through these troubling times. Laughing can help you lighten up when you may feel […]
Learning to shift from a drama-filled life to one of empowerment begins with focusing on outcomes more than problems. However, it is easy to get captivated by problems and drawn deeper into only seeing them and the anxiety they create. David shares a story about working with an executive who had just been promoted to […]
“Cancel culture” is a term that has become popular in the last couple of years. With the recent ugly, reactive, traumatic, and drama-filled events in the US, we have noticed the phrase used more often. Wikipedia defines it this way: “Cancel culture (or call-out culture) is a modern form of ostracism in which someone is […]
